Older women are not attractive to men?

[Argus]

Much insults have been heaped upon this writer for saying he wasn't interested in women who are 50 and older (he is 50), but he echoes a theme we've seen elsewhere. One online dating site said last year that while women considered  the 'perfect age' for men was generally a few years older than them, men thought the perfect age for women was 19. And that never changed, despite how old the men got. 

In defense of men, I think that, like women, they are simply responding to instincts. Men are hard-coded to want to mate with women of child-bearing age. And that instinct does not care how reasonable or realistic that is. Women, on the other hand, are instinctively drawn to strong, powerful, aggressive men - by instinct. Those are the men who, for a million years, would be seen as the best providers and defenders of them and their children. And it doesn't matter that this is not actually true these days, where the scrawny computer engineer can earn five times the salary of the big strong labourer, and a civilized society makes violence unlikely.  It's all instinct.

I'm not sure if it's Jonathan Haidt, or some other psychologist who has pointed out that most of our decisions are made on instinct, and then we use our intellect to rationalize what our instincts and emotions are telling us to do. But I think, by and large, that's the case with those we find sexually attractive.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-46788256

[BubberMiley]

When online porn became widespread, the big holy shit from the porn companies was the popularity of grannyporn. So maybe "men" cannot be generalized so severely and, if they are, we should question the results.

[scribblet]

Have a widowed friend who tried the on line dating thing a few years ago which we helped her with as she was (still is) poor with a computer, she ponied up the money but it was worth every penny for the laughs we had.   Everyone of the guys wanted a female from 18 - 40 for you - know - companionship and later, after a long walk on beach...   you get the picture. 

She had a good saying though about the older widowed guys, what they want is a nurse, preferably a nurse with a purse.

[Argus]

6 hours ago, BubberMiley said:

When online porn became widespread, the big holy shit from the porn companies was the popularity of grannyporn. So maybe "men" cannot be generalized so severely and, if they are, we should question the results.

And there's guys who love fat women, and ones who love feet. But overall, men of all ages think 19 year olds are hottest.

https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2018/08/online-dating-out-of-your-league/567083/

[AngusThermopyle]

Personally I prefer women around my age. Younger women are just too irritating, vacuous, insufferable and down right stupid.

[Argus]

1 minute ago, AngusThermopyle said:

Personally I prefer women around my age. Younger women are just too irritating, vacuous, insufferable and down right stupid.

Depends on the 19 year old. I've known a few who were... intersting.

But I believe this is talking about sexual desirability, not ones ability to relate to, chat with, and enjoy life with someone.

[Goddess]

26 minutes ago, Argus said:

 

But I believe this is talking about sexual desirability, not ones ability to relate to, chat with, and enjoy life with someone.

He seems to be talking about both? He seems to be saying that he cannot love a woman over 50 because their body isn't perfect anymore?

 

Quote

 

A popular French author and television presenter has caused outrage after claiming he was “incapable” of loving a woman aged over 50.

 

Quote

 

“I prefer younger women’s bodies, that’s all. End of. The body of a 25-year-old woman is extraordinary. The body of a woman of 50 is not extraordinary at all,”

 

I agree with your comments about being led by instincts - we are mammals after all - but mature people use their intellect to override those baser instincts.  this guy seems quite.....ummmm.....un-evolved?

For someone so judgmental about female aging, the picture of him is rather unimpressive.  Old, grey, and probably a paunch, judging from his jowls.....doesn't look like that great of a catch, especially factoring in his issues with female bodies.  This is what makes him unattractive to me.  And probably why he is more attracted to younger, less experienced, less mature , less self-aware women.

Shallow Hal comes to mind......

 

[Argus]

2 hours ago, Goddess said:

He seems to be talking about both? He seems to be saying that he cannot love a woman over 50 because their body isn't perfect anymore?

He is, but I was referring to the Atlantic article on men preferring teenage girls, even when they (the men) were in their sixties and seventies. I think we're all just a hostage to our instincts, men and women. We can pretend to use our intellect to override it but I don't think we really do so much as resign ourselves to not getting what we really want in the way of men/women. Women aren't going to (usually) get that six foot 3 guy with powerful shoulders and a deep voice who can run down antelope and protect you from bears, and men aren't (usually) going to get that hot, big busted, nineteen year old with the hourglass body who can bear lots of health babies).

And the fact most men aren't really looking to have lots of healthy babies, and that women don't actually need to be protected from bears or have a husband who can hunt down an antelope for dinner is largely irrelevant.

[paxamericana]

So some interesting theory I've read. Women like men who are successful in their dominance hierarchy with other men. Essentially ladies prefer competant men who are at the top of that social hierarchy. Outsourcing the selection problem to men. They allow men to compete with one another and pick the top agreed upon by other men. Indirectly men get to pick who among them get the girl.

The opposite is also true women do not like girly men, men who are pushovers, lacking confidence and self esteem, they view them as friends but not mates. 

Obviously all other factor removed men are visual creatures and as far as mating is concern we need child bearing age women. 

Companion ship is a different story. 

Edited January 9, 2019 by paxamericana

[betsy]

19 hours ago, Argus said:

Much insults have been heaped upon this writer for saying he wasn't interested in women who are 50 and older (he is 50), but he echoes a theme we've seen elsewhere. One online dating site said last year that while women considered  the 'perfect age' for men was generally a few years older than them, men thought the perfect age for women was 19. And that never changed, despite how old the men got. 

In defense of men, I think that, like women, they are simply responding to instincts. Men are hard-coded to want to mate with women of child-bearing age. And that instinct does not care how reasonable or realistic that is. Women, on the other hand, are instinctively drawn to strong, powerful, aggressive men - by instinct. Those are the men who, for a million years, would be seen as the best providers and defenders of them and their children. And it doesn't matter that this is not actually true these days, where the scrawny computer engineer can earn five times the salary of the big strong labourer, and a civilized society makes violence unlikely.  It's all instinct.

I'm not sure if it's Jonathan Haidt, or some other psychologist who has pointed out that most of our decisions are made on instinct, and then we use our intellect to rationalize what our instincts and emotions are telling us to do. But I think, by and large, that's the case with those we find sexually attractive.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-46788256

 

I suppose, it depends on the motive.   Some older people want to have young mates to boost up their self-esteem.  We have "boy toys" (who can forget Cher?), and "cougars" for women - a term if not mistaken I think, popularized by Demi Moore/Ashton Kutcher.

There's no denying it that younger people are quite attractive.   Lol, when you reach a certain age (as in old age) - all young people look pleasing to the eye!    

 

It depends too what age you both are.  Women in their forties could comfortably settle nicely with a much older man compared to a woman in her thirties.

Realistically - especially in this day and age - it's almost impossible to keep that May-December relationship long-lasting.

[OftenWrong]

What's sexually attractive is fit, healthy, happy. Not young, not old.

[BubberMiley]

Pornhub stats indicate the categories MILF and Mature both had more searches than the Teen category. You can't argue with fapping data.

[DogOnPorch]

Canadian meteorologist, Dagmar Midcap...50 years old. Now works in San Diego.

[OftenWrong]

You think young people can't be unfit, unhealthy, unhappy? "Young" in itself means nothing.

[Michael Hardner]

23 hours ago, OftenWrong said:

What's sexually attractive is fit, healthy, happy. Not young, not old.

Confident and strong.  As such, I know wisdom more as I age and I see strength and wisdom in older women.

[Argus]

This girl has almost fourteen million subscribers on Youtube. Would anyone care to offer a guess why?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g5t4YXu9V2I&t=274s&list=PLa7SaB6RofYQJqrFPqniKN4LkYJSseg34&index=96

[QuebecOverCanada]

I'm a young buck myself, 23 years of age and can confirm that women twice my age do not interest me by the little bit, but there are some MILFs that are worth a shot, but I couldn't fall in love with them neither, because the end result of love is the creation of a family unit in my opinion, it's all based around it, with or without children. I could not see myself living with an older woman and waking up and see her without makeup and her looks starting to fade away, starting to lose her hair by 55, etc. I'd rather be with the 20 years old I'm matching on Tinder and Bumble. 

[Guest]

On 1/10/2019 at 5:24 PM, Argus said:

This girl has almost fourteen million subscribers on Youtube. Would anyone care to offer a guess why?

 

Is it her profound intellect?

[Guest]

I know two men in relationships with much older women. One is the trophy husband of a very wealthy woman. He has an allowance, golfs and works out several hours every day, shows up well groomed, well scripted and on time for business/social dinners and events and pleases his partner on demand. He flys home to visit about once per year and claims to find her attractive and fun to talk with. Though he acknowledges he would never would have been in that relationship without the lifestyle that accompanies it, he says the sex is not a burden or a chore.

The other is someone who used to be involved with exclusively younger women but now is enthralled with a golden girl. He says he appreciates her wit, wisdom, sense of humour and has even alluded to the idea that, when in the bedroom, experience compensates for much of what is lost to gravity and time. 

[OftenWrong]

On 1/10/2019 at 5:24 PM, Argus said:

This girl has almost fourteen million subscribers on Youtube. Would anyone care to offer a guess why?

Because it's easy for a woman to do up her hair, put on a little makeup, wear a miniskirt, push-up bra, to turn most men into drooling dogs.

"And all females is poison! Them and their wicked wiles!"
- Grumpy

[Guest]

I've been married to an older women for 37 years.  She still seems to like me so I'm obviously doing something right.

[August1991]

On 1/8/2019 at 10:01 AM, Argus said:

....

In defense of men, I think that, like women, they are simply responding to instincts. Men are hard-coded to want to mate with women of child-bearing age. And that instinct does not care how reasonable or realistic that is.

....

Argus, using your logic, surely men would seek older women who have survived at least one child birth.

=====

My general thinking now about all these intriguing/moral/Internet questions: the human brain is capable of numerous connections. We can justify anything.

[Donnie]

Everytime my current girl gets to be either 40 or stops working out or just gets fat.  I find a new girl.  Life is too short to be with someone im not attracted to.  

[Michael Hardner]

10 hours ago, Donnie said:

Everytime my current girl gets to be either 40 or stops working out or just gets fat.  I find a new girl.  Life is too short to be with someone im not attracted to.  

You will die lonely and alone... if you aren't grifted by a shallow bimbo before then.  You don't need a girlfriend, you need a succession of prostitutes.  Go forward and pursue your happiness !  ( My opinion only, and no offense meant here. )

[Guest]

9 hours ago, Michael Hardner said:

You will die lonely and alone... if you aren't grifted by a shallow bimbo before then.  You don't need a girlfriend, you need a succession of prostitutes.  Go forward and pursue your happiness !  ( My opinion only, and no offense meant here. )

Oh, he's never had a girlfriend.  No-one who has ever actually been in a real relationship would make such an asinine post.