Mary Sciari

I see your point. As a woman, I chose never to have children because I didn't want to raise them singlehandedly and I knew that even in a committed marriage, it wouldn't have been a 50/50 effort. The most I could have hoped for was maybe 80/20, so it just wasn't worth it to me. I agree that a woman should make sure she has the support before she engages in the behaviour if she doesn't want the expense of raising a child alone.

Men claim they are the victims of women's deception and that women should be forced to have abortions so that the fathers of their children won't have to be financially responsible for the children they both helped conceive, yet they refuse to get vasectomies, which would solve the problem. They would rather that women suffer through abortion procedures, which have a much higher complication rate. As far as child support goes, if you conceive a child, you're responsible for supporting that child. It's not the taxpayers' job. If you don't want that expense, then don't engage in the behavior. You can't weasel your way out of paying child support.

"Women generally don't find much older men physically/sexually attractive. However, there are a number of reasons why they would be attracted to men who have power and resources." The assumption that an older man automatically has power and resources is faulty, too. I have been in two relationships with significantly older men and in each case, for a good part of the time we were together they were unemployed. Neither had assets, college degrees, successful careers, or any of the things I had, though I was much younger. Women are told that we are supposed to be attracted to an older man's "resources", yet these days more women than men are going to college, and going on to graduate school. In my relationships, I was always younger but I was the one with the Master's Degree, the successful career, and the resources of my own.

I think it's because men keep reading online articles about how they all morph into gorgeous hunks when then turn 50, while women "hit the wall". So they think they don't need to take good care of themselves and dress nicely. So they end up, like you said, looking 10 years older than they are, haggard, tired... That's why I refuse to buy into the societal trope that older women are all ugly and undatable while men hit their "sexual prime" at age 50. It's not evolution. It's not biology. It's just our patriarchal society that keeps women in their place. (And I totally agree with you about not wanting to slow down my life to be a nursemaid to a man who hasn't taken care of himself.)

I feel the same way about the men I am attracted to. I am not attracted to men over about 35, even as I get older. I just like young, physically fit, muscular men with chiseled faces, no wrinkles, grey hair or receding hairline, and I have yet to see a man past his mid-30's who looks like this.

Exactly. Men convince themselves they are in their prime even when they are elderly, bald, obese, and have erectile dysfunction. But they tell women they

Exactly. Men convince themselves they are in their prime even when they are elderly, bald, obese, and have erectile dysfunction. But they tell women they are "over the hill" after age 25. Yet, oddly, they persist in the delusion that young girls and women are attracted to them.

That's precisely my point. You automatically assume that a younger man would never be interested in a romantic relationship with an older woman (but you presume with this last statement that the reverse would be fine, concluding that older women, but not men, are devoid of value). I realize that relationships in which the man is older are more common but believe it or not, there are also relationships in which the woman is older. My mother is older than my father and they have been happily married for many years.

If a woman absolutely does not want to become pregnant, she only has to be extra vigilant, i.e. use two methods of birth control at the same time. (Birth control pill and diaphragm, condoms and pill, etc.). Condoms are not a reliable method of contraception on their own. Use your brain and be the one in control of your own body.

HappBo said the dating site was for "hookups and romantic relationships", so why do you assume that the men who want to meet her are only looking for hookups? If the gender roles were reversed, you wouldn't say that.

Actually, in prehistoric times, girls of 13 were not commonly pregnant. Both boys and girls go through puberty years earlier now than they used to. In any case, the beginning of puberty certainly does not mark sexual maturity. The body is still developing. There is no way to reasonably argue that a grown adult should have sex with a 13 year old child. It is pedophilia and it should be illegal. There is never an excuse. No child is ever "mature" enough to consent.

The argument that older men are "just following their instincts" by pursuing young women and girls because they are "fertile" never made sense to me. If you're talking about evolution, there's nothing biologically sound about an old man producing offspring with a 19 year old. He's past his reproductive prime. He's more likely to produce defective offspring and to be infertile. It makes more sense for young men to mate with young women, which would reduce the chance of defective offspring. So the mere fact that they are attracted to young women does not argue for them to act on it. Also, they are delusional if they believe that they actually are " at their "sexual peak" in their 50's and that women in their 20's are attracted to them. The vast majority of young women want men their own age.