Goddess

Yes, I have an odd sense of humour. I think the book you're thinking of is Night Probe. Ya, it was a gooder. Sahara was good too. And then the movie.

Yes, I've read quite a few of them. I'm waiting for the one where they introduce Dirk's older brother - Arm. **ba dumm tsssss**

Just thinking about this some more: I still don't think the ad is labelling ALL MEN or that its saying men should be less masculine (unless your definition of masculine includes mocking other men for being "emotional" or taking an interest in things that are "girly" or gay, and dismissing bullying and sexual harassment with "boys will be boys") but.... "Toxic Masculinity" I'm not sure I'm on board with that phrase. It seems like it conflates positive and negative characteristics. Every intelligent man knows that bullying, unprovoked aggression, sexual assault and misogyny are not acceptable. But there is still a broad spectrum of positive traits that are typically male. Being a responsible male is not synonymous with becoming more like a female. (Although I don't think the ad is saying that, either.) Same goes for "Toxic Femininity" - women typically have certain traits that are positive. And women should not have to become like men, to be able to function in the world. Maybe we should get rid of "toxic masculinity" and "toxic femininity" and simply label such people what they are - a$$holes.

My man is a trucker and you are 100% correct. He has all the same concerns that you do. The number of truck drivers who do not speak English and wear flip flops while driving, is staggering. And yes, there has been very little regulation of licences - any foreign driver's licence is good enough for Canada and many in the industry suspect the licences are either forged or drivers are given jobs because they are the same ethnicity as the trucking owner, not because they are actually experienced truck drivers. You are correct - the industry has been taken over by one particular culture and they have absolutely no concern for public safety. My man says he does a walk-around check of his rig every day before he leaves the yard and it disgusts him that he is the only one who does that. He is tired of having to drop trailers for men who can't because they are wearing flip flops. Humboldt was going to happen sooner or later. It's very sad that it took that incident to shine a light on the industry.

See?? The ad worked! Have a good weekend, QOC. Nice discussing with you today.

LOL It's funny because we were just watching the old Blue Hawaii with Elvis and he turns a woman over his knees and spanks her. The next day, she sits at the breakfast table on a pillow because her ass is so sore. Ahhhhh, the old days!!

Why is it important to you that little boys are allowed to hit each other? I don't understand. And we're not talking about men who have to physically fight off an attacker or anything like that. Don't change the goalposts. Why is it important that little boys be allowed to punch and hit each other?

Sorry, you said the women were told to "cheer up". There is no words in that snippet, so I assumed you were talking about the pool party where the women are ordered to "smile" for unwanted filming. That snippet seems to be a music video being filmed and likely making a statement about how women are portrayed in some music videos. Perhaps it's you who needs to go back and watch the video again.

I believe that's the behaviour that the ad is trying to stop.

It appears to be a pool party they are at and there a couple of guys trying to film them in the bathing suits and telling them to "smile". From the look on their faces, it's clear they do not want to be filmed. Another man steps in and tells them to leave the women alone. This is not "flirting". Women like flirting. We don't like sexual harrassment. The two are not the same. If you're arguing that "men can't flirt anymore" you either don't understand what fllirting is or you're just pretending not to in order to set up a strawman argument in favor of sexual harrassment. Flirting is about building desire and it's often subtle. It's paying attention to the other person's emotions and body language in order to create intimacy with them. It's 2-way, it's playful and it's a fun exchange that makes everyone feel good. Sexual harrassment is the opposite. It's devoid of empathy and it's about forcing your will on another person without any regard for their desires. Which is what was being portrayed in the ad.

It is not portraying "rough & tumble play". From the look on the one boy's face, he is in distress. A dad separates them and tells the boys not to fight and hit each other. "Boys will be boys" is the excuse given for a lot of bad male behaviour. That's why it's being addressed in the ad. Maybe you're not aware of the prevalence of it as an excuse: https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/gender-and-schooling/201403/the-danger-boys-will-be-boys https://www.scarymommy.com/boys-will-be-boys-is-bullsht-bad-behavior/ https://www.scarymommy.com/boys-will-be-boys-is-bullsht-bad-behavior/ https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/problem-boys-parents-hesaid/

I re-watched the ad and I still don't see where they say ALL MEN are like this. I did notice they said, "We believe in the best of men." and "Some men already know." Those indicate to me that they are not saying this is ALL MEN. Sorry, I just don't see how this ad is attacking ALL MEN.

I'm not out of arguments. There's just no point in discussing with you if you believe what the ad portrays has no relevance to real life and only want to flip the topic to what you perceive as women's failures. If you want to correct me, use the reply box and don't change what I said in my own reply box, please.

Please don't change what I said and then put it in a quote box, like that's what I said. If it applies to some men, then what's the problem? You want to make sure that everybody knows that not ALL men are like portrayed in the video? Don't worry. We do.

You don't agree that the ad applies to men. That's fine. That's your opinion. My opinion is that the ad IS pertinent. If you want to talk about how women are cunty manipulative gold-diggers start a thread about it and if I want to, I'll join that discussion. You're the one changing the argument and the thread topic.

I do understand. It's offends you when men's violence is talked about.

So......you want ads that address women that "may" be like that, but you don't want ads directed to men who "may" be like the men portrayed in the ad. Got it.

I understand that you do not want men's issues discussed. You're trying to flip it to your perceived women's issues - ie: women are cunty manipulative gold-diggers.

You're flipping the argument. This is about men and the Gillette ad - not about women.

Why do you feel that men do not have any changing to do in their thinking or behaviours but women do?

I don't see this ad as attacking masculinity. I see it as redefining it. I see it as expanding it. I'm not sure why that frightens and offends some men. MY BF says that his father taught him to be respectful of women - opening car doors, etc. Which is great. But his father also said things like, "I will never vote for a woman politician. It's not their place." and every time his mother talked about buying something, he would chastise her with, "Yeah, with MY MONEY!!!" like she had no hand in and contributed nothing to the 58 year marriage and didn't deserve to spend $20 on that new whatever. Respecting women is much more than just opening car doors for them. I'm not judging his dad - he was 81 when he died last year and was really just a product of his times. But thank the Goddess, men with those views are a dying breed. I also think equality scares some men. Maybe they think if they give up any power to women, women will take over and dominate them in the same way men have dominated women through the centuries. I've also seen relationships where the wife is clearly calling the shots on everything. That is just as dysfunctional and detrimental to families as when the man calls the shots on everything.

Ummm, no. That's why I made the distinction between "manly" men and men who are physically aggressive with women. I was stumped before for a word instead of "manly" but I think I'm talking about general "man" traits, the ways men and women are different. Not in a bad way, but let's face it - men and women often think differently about things. I would say it's more than 1%.

Hmmm.....I see what you're saying. I'm not sure women are the ones to blame for male aggression, though. (I know you're not blaming it JUST on women.) Perhaps like men are not generally attracted to a "butch" looking woman, women are generally not attracted to effeminate males. And while women in general may be attracted to more "manly" men (I can't think of a better word right now) the vast majority of us are not into getting beaten. A personal anecdote, I broke up with someone who got into fights everywhere we went - sometimes verbal, sometimes physical. When I talked to him about it, he said, "I don't start fights, baby, I finish them." Good-bye. Thanks for playing. So yeah, not all women are into aggressive males.