Bryan Posted July 6, 2016 Report Share Posted July 6, 2016 Science says your sexual orientation is not a choice. That's not science, it's a political opinion. The fact is, people absolutely do make that choice all the time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryan Posted July 6, 2016 Report Share Posted July 6, 2016 A challenge to anyone who claims to have been "converted" from gay to heterosexual: sit in a room and have a few good-looking underwear models of the same sex dance naked in front of you for 5 minutes. If your penis/clitoris gets erect, sorry you're still gay/bi. Go watch a shoot-em-up action movie. If you show any signs of interest, sorry you're a serial killer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
?Impact Posted July 6, 2016 Report Share Posted July 6, 2016 (edited) I never chose to get erections when I was 12 years old when I saw women with big breasts, it just suddenly happened, & I had no control over it. You grew up in the world for 12 years, a world that hid women's breasts from you, a world that told you that the forbidden fruit was associated with sex. It is no wonder that when you body was undergoing changes you would react as you did. Remember that the brain is the most important sex organ of all, that is why the pornography industry does so well. If you grew up in a world where we didn't wear clothes, where we didn't advertise the female form on billboards, then your reaction would be different. Don't discount those 12 years of conditioning. I believe there are many factors concerning sexual orientation, and free choice is one of them. That doesn't mean there are other, potentially stronger, factors that are not involved. You brain begins developing long before you exit the womb, and continues throughout your life. We have only a very limited understanding of the human brain and emotions. Often there are conflicts, and some people have a very hard time resolving those conflicts. The biggest conflict however has been society trying to establish standards, and forcing people to conform to those standards. As a society we need to tolerate, if not celebrate, the differences in people. I have no problem accepting someone who is gay, lesbian, or transgender, regardless if that was something they feel they were born with or it was a conscious choice they made. The only time I become concerned is when someones actions affects others negatively. To me the pervert is not someone that is different from me, it is someone that abuses others. Consenting adults participating in private (ie. only with other consenting adults, regardless of gender or number) affairs is not my business. It is only when someone draws in another non-consenting person, and minors are by definition non-consenting, that they become perverts. There are just as many, nay far far more, heterosexual perverts around. *Graham, don't you think it is about time you updated your Gender from "Not Telling"? I think the cat is out of the bag. Edited July 6, 2016 by ?Impact Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moonlight Graham Posted July 6, 2016 Report Share Posted July 6, 2016 Go watch a shoot-em-up action movie. If you show any signs of interest, sorry you're a serial killer. No, but you're attracted to violence. So you're saying you're not a homosexual if you don't have sex with the same sex? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moonlight Graham Posted July 6, 2016 Report Share Posted July 6, 2016 *Graham, don't you think it is about time you updated your Gender from "Not Telling"? I think the cat is out of the bag. I only make to love to consenting kangaroos, but that option isnt on the the drop-down menu. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryan Posted July 7, 2016 Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 So you're saying you're not a homosexual if you don't have sex with the same sex? Depends on the person. Ask them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dialamah Posted July 7, 2016 Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 I'm pretty sure females feel the same way - If you don't enjoy sex together, not a chance in hell the marriage will survive. Better to find out before, there is no possibility for divorce. Actually, this isn't true. There are perfectly happy celibate couples, and couples where one enjoys sex much more than the other. They don't advertise these quirks, just exactly because there's a perception that sex = relationship and that no sex = no relationship. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WestCoastRunner Posted July 7, 2016 Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 (edited) Actually, this isn't true. There are perfectly happy celibate couples, and couples where one enjoys sex much more than the other. They don't advertise these quirks, just exactly because there's a perception that sex = relationship and that no sex = no relationship. True. Bu my point is that females own their sexuality. We don't let others dictate when and why we should have sex. Edited July 7, 2016 by WestCoastRunner Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacee Posted July 7, 2016 Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 It's like vegetarians banning meat. Lol Ya like that. (And maybe they're really closet meat eaters ... who hate themselves for it.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ash74 Posted July 7, 2016 Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 Actually, this isn't true. There are perfectly happy celibate couples, and couples where one enjoys sex much more than the other. They don't advertise these quirks, just exactly because there's a perception that sex = relationship and that no sex = no relationship. But at the same time it proves my point. If a couple do not have a high sex drive they will get along better than if one person has a low sex drive in a relationship with a person with a higher sex drive. Or vice versa. A couple can be happy if both are comfortable with the relationship that has little to no physical basis but if you get one of those people that are in constant heat you will likely see a divorce. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacee Posted July 7, 2016 Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 That's not science, it's a political opinion. The fact is, people absolutely do make that choice all the time. For men, studies suggest that orientation is fixed by the time the individual reaches puberty. Women show greater levels of "erotic plasticity," meaning their levels of attraction are more significantly shaped by culture, experience and love than is the case for men. However, even women who switch from gay to straight lifestyles don't stop being attracted to women, according to a 2012 study in the journal Archives of Sexual Behavior. Those results suggest that while people can change their behavior, they aren't really changing their basic sexual attraction. Those who promote and believe in 'conversion therapy' are just in denial. But hey ... if a gay person wants to pretend to be straight, and their partner is OK with it ... that is a choice they can make. . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryan Posted July 7, 2016 Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 Those who deny that people can and do change their minds all the time need to get out of the house and meet people. Trying to claim it doesn't happen is like trying to claim that there is no such thing as carrots -- the more you insist on it the dumber you look. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
betsy Posted July 7, 2016 Author Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 A challenge to anyone who claims to have been "converted" from gay to heterosexual: sit in a room and have a few good-looking underwear models of the same sex dance naked in front of you for 5 minutes. If your penis/clitoris gets erect, sorry you're still gay/bi. Since they've had gay-sex encounters, what if they're just reacting to the stimulus that's associated with erotic pleasures they'd had in the past?? We heard of girls in boarding schools having erotic pleasures with one another - it's a sexual experimentation in most adolescents, especially at the stage of sexual awareness.....and it will be irresponsible to label them all as bisexuals and lesbians! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
betsy Posted July 7, 2016 Author Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 (edited) Science says your sexual orientation is not a choice. I never chose to get erections when I was 12 years old when I saw women with big breasts, it just suddenly happened, & I had no control over it. But not all gays, are actually gays. I'm not saying gays are amoral, but there are such people that are amoral. They could get a kick out of things we find depraved, simply because they have no concerns over what's moral or not, or what's wrong or right. They could just as easily get excited watching a snuff porn, or watching two men having sex as he would have an erection seeing big breasted women.....and yet, he is not gay. Edited July 7, 2016 by betsy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eyeball Posted July 7, 2016 Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 Those who deny that people can and do change their minds all the time need to get out of the house and meet people. Trying to claim it doesn't happen is like trying to claim that there is no such thing as carrots -- the more you insist on it the dumber you look. I notice you haven't changed your's on this topic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
betsy Posted July 7, 2016 Author Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 (edited) I never chose to get erections when I was 12 years old when I saw women with big breasts, it just suddenly happened, & I had no control over it. At the age of 12, if you'd seen a porn mag of two men having sex - it will affect you. How can it not? You're at that age! Edited July 7, 2016 by betsy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
betsy Posted July 7, 2016 Author Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 (edited) Actually, this isn't true. There are perfectly happy celibate couples, and couples where one enjoys sex much more than the other. They don't advertise these quirks, just exactly because there's a perception that sex = relationship and that no sex = no relationship. I agree with you, dialamah. There are a lot of celibate couples. Their relationship had transcended beyond the mere physical. Imho, reaching that stage wherein you find fulfillment in companionship, is reaching a higher plane or level. This is a very sex-oriented world we live in....everything revolves around sex. People are pressured I guess to project a certain image that they're among the "norm." I've seen a talk show way back. There are many women who don't enjoy having the actual sex act (although they enjoy the foreplays). Not because they're cold fish, or their partners don't know how to please them....some just don't. They just go through the motion. Edited July 7, 2016 by betsy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
betsy Posted July 7, 2016 Author Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 (edited) Science says your sexual orientation is not a choice. That does not mean you're born gay! There is no conclusive evidence to that. Well, of course it's not a choice if there are factors that turned you that way. If you were raised to think you're a girl and made confused of your sexuality - you've got no choice for turning up the way you are. But that doesn't mean you can't change. To say that gays are born gay, is simply based on assumption! All theories of sex strike some sort of balance between the influence of social and cultural factors and the influence of natural, biological factors. For example, the question of whether homosexuality is the result of biological influences (such as a gay gene) or social and cultural ones (such as having a clinging, intrusive mother) has come up over and over in every generation of theory, and there is still no definite answer. http://www.tylerstillman.info/uploads/2/1/5/2/21520198/_baumeister_stillman_sexhbkplasticityfinal.pdf No studies have found specific "gay genes" that reliably make someone gay. But some genes may make being gay likelier. Copyright 2015 LiveScience, https://www.yahoo.com/news/being-gay-not-choice-science-contradicts-ben-carson-123132266.html?ref=gs Edited July 7, 2016 by betsy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacee Posted July 7, 2016 Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 (edited) Those who deny that people can and do change their minds all the time need to get out of the house and meet people. Trying to claim it doesn't happen is like trying to claim that there is no such thing as carrots -- the more you insist on it the dumber you look. People may change their behaviour, but not their sexual attractions.It's dumb to think they do. And why the hell do some claiming to be heterosexual care so damn much what sexuality other people have? It's really not your business, nor Betsy's. . Edited July 7, 2016 by jacee Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
betsy Posted July 7, 2016 Author Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 (edited) People may change their behaviour, but not their sexual attractions. It's dumb to think they do. And why the hell do some claiming to be heterosexual care so damn much what sexuality other people have? It's really not your business, nor Betsy's. . On that same token, it's really none of your business what I care about, isn't it? So you gave your input - we know where you stand. Why are you tying yourself in a knot over what we care? You busybody you...... Edited July 7, 2016 by betsy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Squid Posted July 7, 2016 Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 Since they've had gay-sex encounters, what if they're just reacting to the stimulus that's associated with erotic pleasures they'd had in the past?? We heard of girls in boarding schools having erotic pleasures with one another - it's a sexual experimentation in most adolescents, especially at the stage of sexual awareness.....and it will be irresponsible to label them all as bisexuals and lesbians! What should be the punishment for having gay sex? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
betsy Posted July 7, 2016 Author Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 (edited) What should be the punishment for having gay sex? What's that got to do with the topic??? We're talking about transformation! Edited July 7, 2016 by betsy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryan Posted July 7, 2016 Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 People may change their behaviour, but not their sexual attractions. People change their sexual attractions ALL OF THE TIME. Used to really be into asians, now he likes redheads. Used to like bodybuilders, now she likes heroin-chic. The wife used to really do it for him, now he likes his secretary better. Used to be a leg man, now big boobs are all the does it for him. Used to like college girls, now MILFs turn him on. Used to like boys, now likes girls. Etc. Etc. And why the hell do some claiming to be heterosexual care so damn much what sexuality other people have? It's really not your business, nor Betsy's. I don't care. They can do what they want. This thread is about the fact that people can change if they want to, not about making anyone do something they don't want to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
?Impact Posted July 7, 2016 Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 This thread is about the fact that people can change if they want to, not about making anyone do something they don't want to. My understanding of the thread is that God is changing people, with a strong implication that is better (ie. they need changing). b.t.w. putting the qualifier 'want' is interesting. Are you implying we have no control over our wants, or that our wants should be set (heavily influenced) by someone/thing external to ourselves? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
betsy Posted July 7, 2016 Author Report Share Posted July 7, 2016 People may change their behaviour, but not their sexual attractions. It's dumb to think they do. Bryan answered well. I might also add that your perspective changes as you get older - so does your preferences for other things. Why should it be any different for sexual preferences? Even how you wanna do it changes over the years! How many 60-something would still prefer doing it in the backseat? Though chiropractors would be thrilled - I'm sure our ageing Romeo and Juliet would be out of commission for who knows how long! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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