how do you deal with bad news?

[msdogfood]

got some very bad news today!!.

when you get bad news how do you deal with it???

[wyly]

got some very bad news today!!.

when you get bad news how do you deal with it???

badly...sorry can't help you...

[jbg]

When I was 15 and learned that my Dad was going to die in a month or so, I went ahead and performed in the concert band that night. My mother did not enjoy the sleety drive that night of December 15, 1972.

In short, I dealt with it by continuing "business as usual".

[kimmy]

I punch things. I have a heavy bag, a speed bag, and some targets hung around my pad. Letting loose the anger, stress, and physical tension is a good first step in moving on to dealing productively with whatever the problem may be.

-k

[bush_cheney2004]

"Bad news" is a very relative thing...so that's how I process it. Which is really just shorthand for accelerating through the so called "7 Stages of Grief" to the new reality....I can deal with reality...even when it smells bad:

1. SHOCK & DENIAL

2. PAIN & GUILT

3. ANGER & BARGAINING

4. DEPRESSION, REFLECTION, LONELINESS

5. THE UPWARD TURN

6. RECONSTRUCTION & WORKING THROUGH

7. ACCEPTANCE & HOPE

[Shwa]

Quiet reflection in a calm and peaceful environment. Sometimes it helps to put things into perspective as best you can, even when dealing with severe grief as B-C points out above.

[charter.rights]

I punch things. I have a heavy bag, a speed bag, and some targets hung around my pad. Letting loose the anger, stress, and physical tension is a good first step in moving on to dealing productively with whatever the problem may be.

-k

I hope your children aren't included in that, or that they aren't around when you resort to violence to express your anger.

[Sir Bandelot]

Don't withdraw into yourself by feeling sorry for yourself. Think about how other people involved in your situation also might feel, try and be supportive of them. If for example a loved one has cancer, and this is devestating for you remember that they are the ones who need support the most. If it's you, remember that your family is anxious and afraid, so you've got to be strong for them.

[charter.rights]

"Bad news" is a very relative thing...so that's how I process it. Which is really just shorthand for accelerating through the so called "7 Stages of Grief" to the new reality....I can deal with reality...even when it smells bad:

1. SHOCK & DENIAL

2. PAIN & GUILT

3. ANGER & BARGAINING

4. DEPRESSION, REFLECTION, LONELINESS

5. THE UPWARD TURN

6. RECONSTRUCTION & WORKING THROUGH

7. ACCEPTANCE & HOPE

Those stages of grief are universal as well to other problems such as divorce, loss of a job etc. If one recognizes and allows the stages to unfold in quiet reflection, it will be an easier result.

[kimmy]

I hope your children aren't included in that, or that they aren't around when you resort to violence to express your anger.

1] I don't have kids.

2] I don't consider hitting inanimate objects to be "violence".

and, 3] you're an idiot.

-k

[charter.rights]

1] I don't have kids.

2] I don't consider hitting inanimate objects to be "violence".

and, 3] you're an idiot.

-k

1. Good!

2. Yes it is violence.

3. You're incorrect. But I don't expect much more from a blond.

[M.Dancer]

Kimmy wins

[Shakeyhands]

Kimmy wins

again.

[charter.rights]

Kimmy wins

Alas...you are the perpetual loser.

[Mr.Canada]

Whenever I recieve bad news I take it in stride. I honestly don't get upset over it becuase that won't help the situation at all. It is best to remain calm and figure out a solution to said problem. If there is no solution to the problem or bad news I simply dismiss it and remove it from my life as their is nothing I can do about it so I don't waste my energy on it.

[kimmy]

2] I don't consider hitting inanimate objects to be "violence".

2. Yes it is violence.

Oh, of course. I forgot that I was talking to Mr Electron Soup. You believe that there's no difference between yourself and inanimate objects. I'm punching your spirit when I'm punching my punching bag, right?

You should go chomp down a few Tylenols, little buddy, because I'm about to give my speedbag your spirit a serious beating.

-k

[charter.rights]

Oh, of course. I forgot that I was talking to Mr Electron Soup. You believe that there's no difference between yourself and inanimate objects. I'm punching your spirit when I'm punching my punching bag, right?

You should go chomp down a few Tylenols, little buddy, because I'm about to give my speedbag your spirit a serious beating.

-k

Of course "you don't get it either". You can't hurt me with your violence, but you will hurt yourself.

Edited March 2, 2010 by charter.rights

[RB]

got some very bad news today!!.

when you get bad news how do you deal with it???

I didn't have lots of bad news, the few times I was disappointed I shared it with my husband - he handles news very well and I go shopping. One time I was disappointed I mentioned it to my doctor and he was very interested in what I had to say so now I have another victim to listen but I still go shopping.

[jbg]

I didn't have lots of bad news, the few times I was disappointed I shared it with my husband - he handles news very well and I go shopping. One time I was disappointed I mentioned it to my doctor and he was very interested in what I had to say so now I have another victim to listen but I still go shopping.

I'm glad you've returned the thread to some semblance of non-stupidity.

[Sir Bandelot]

I'm glad you've returned the thread to some semblance of non-stupidity.

I was thinking the same thing jbg, glad you said it. Someone is asking for help here. Let's stop the pissing match.

[msdogfood]

how do you deal with a loss??.

[eyeball]

It's probably best to not try dealing with it all by yourself.

[Shwa]

how do you deal with a loss??.

You grieve. One of the good things nowadays - BC has provided an example - is that there are well-known stages to grief. This knowledge helps us understand that we will pass through this period of loss and that life indeed goes on.

Grief is one of those key aspects of the human emotional life that has had profound effects on history and yet seems to be often ignored or avoided as a cause. Hopefully those in grief have a loving, suppoting family to lean on while they go through the process, but if not there are many support mechanisms in the community including doctors and social agencies.

[Bonam]

Depends on the loss. If it's the loss of a loved one or family member, not much you can do but deal with it. Some people just try to ignore it and go on with their lives, others go through a grieving period.

By the way, in regards to the "stages of grief" thing, recent studies have shown that it has no basis in fact, it was just a model used by a particular scientist. Different people deal with grief differently and not everyone goes through these same stages in the same order.

[Sir Bandelot]

My experience in the loss of loved ones is, you get together with your friends and family, you grieve, and then you wait. It takes a long time, years even, and you will never forget it. But eventually life moves you along.