Marriage vows attack

[RB]

I mean you'd like to hang on to tradition of "'till death do we part" and "to honor and obey". Truth is that you'd be in the success stats if you make it 10 years with the same person

My feeling is because most marriage vows are broken that folks are burden to redress of those vows & commitments they made years before.

What it really amounts to is the stigmas of personal failure.

[Renegade]

In my view, marriage should offer more choices than "till death do us part". You should be able to sign up for whatever term you want to, 1year, 2 years, 5 years, or "till death". Of course, if you sign up for a term, you can renew if you both mutually wish to. It would sure take the pressure of considering marriage a "failure".

As far as "honour", it is hard to know what exactly that means in the context of a marriage. "Obey" is an outdated term which has no place in marriage vows.

[Hicksey]

Why is it that failures are regarded with such negativity?

Is it not through failure we learn the most?

Your life is what you make it.

You can write your own vows now. Why not do it yourself?

Why does the government need to step in and protect people for themselves? Are we all that helpless?

[M.Dancer]

In my view, marriage should offer more choices than "till death do us part". You should be able to sign up for whatever term you want to, 1year, 2 years, 5 years, or "till death". Of course, if you sign up for a term, you can renew if you both mutually wish to. It would sure take the pressure of considering marriage a "failure".

As far as "honour", it is hard to know what exactly that means in the context of a marriage. "Obey" is an outdated term which has no place in marriage vows.

I can't see too many people who want children signing up for 5 year hitches......I didn't get married till i was 39...mainly because until I found a woman who wanted kids, I saw no reason to do the deed.

[Renegade]

I can't see too many people who want children signing up for 5 year hitches......I didn't get married till i was 39...mainly because until I found a woman who wanted kids, I saw no reason to do the deed.

Probably not, but it can be customized for the couple's needs. Kids aren't the only reason people get married, and even those who do, may want to sign up for a longer (eg 20yr) term.

[M.Dancer]

I can't see too many people who want children signing up for 5 year hitches......I didn't get married till i was 39...mainly because until I found a woman who wanted kids, I saw no reason to do the deed.

Probably not, but it can be customized for the couple's needs. Kids aren't the only reason people get married, and even those who do, may want to sign up for a longer (eg 20yr) term.

For me it was. While I can understand that a marriage without children is as valid as one that is...for me the idea of marrying and not having kids is like getting a mortgage pre approved but never intending to buy a house.

[Renegade]

While I can understand that a marriage without children is as valid as one that is...for me the idea of marrying and not having kids is like getting a mortgage pre approved but never intending to buy a house.

While your analogy may be apt for you, it would not be for me. For me, the relationship itself is the end goal of marriage. Everything else is incidental.

[RB]

I can't see too many people who want children signing up for 5 year hitches......I didn't get married till i was 39...mainly because until I found a woman who wanted kids, I saw no reason to do the deed.

Probably not, but it can be customized for the couple's needs. Kids aren't the only reason people get married, and even those who do, may want to sign up for a longer (eg 20yr) term.

For me it was. While I can understand that a marriage without children is as valid as one that is...for me the idea of marrying and not having kids is like getting a mortgage pre approved but never intending to buy a house.

I mean how would you summarise the divorce then?

[Figleaf]

Marriage laws exist to serve the perceived needs of the society that promulgates them. As we all know, there has been much debate lately about what those needs are, and what the laws should be.

As it exists now, marriage is about providing special status for indefinite term pair-bonding. It is specifically conceived to apply for life-time planning. Access to divorce doesn't change the purpose, it just lets those who made a mistake recover from it. I would suggest that defined-term marriage would not serve any particular purpose, and so making a legal accommodation for it is unnecessary.

[Renegade]

Marriage laws exist to serve the perceived needs of the society that promulgates them. As we all know, there has been much debate lately about what those needs are, and what the laws should be.

Marriage laws are an artificat of they way society was, it doesn't necessarily meet the needs of what society needs today. The rigid definition of what as a family before, is generally viewed as rigid in society today. The revision of marriage laws are just one small step.

Personally if it were up to me, I'd throw out marriage laws and let anyone come to mutually consensual terms with anyone else(s) they choose.

As it exists now, marriage is about providing special status for indefinite term pair-bonding. It is specifically conceived to apply for life-time planning. Access to divorce doesn't change the purpose, it just lets those who made a mistake recover from it. I would suggest that defined-term marriage would not serve any particular purpose, and so making a legal accommodation for it is unnecessary.

Because it is set up for life-time planning, very few people give much consideration to the consequences of dissolution of marriage, at the time they are undertaking the marriage. This despite the fact that dissolution of marriage is an increasingly common occurance. A fixed term marriage would force that issue to the forefront. Secondarily, why should individuals be forced only a single model of pair-bonding which is based upon historical arrangement? In my view individual choice on how individuals choose to bond should be accomondated.