English to be Official Language of EU

[Durgan]

This subject is not really Provincial Politics, but to the English Speaking members it has some relevancy.

Durgan.

October. 15, 2005 01:00 AM The Toronto Star.

The European Commission has announced English will become the official language of the EU, rather than German, the other front-runner.

Whilst this may initially be regarded as good news for Britain, and the English-speaking world in general, there is a dark underlying aspect that Tony Blair's government is endeavouring to keep hush-hush.

As part of the negotiations, the government conceded that, with the rise of text messaging and emailing, spelling the Queen's English correctly had become of low importance.

Before this trend really takes hold, steps need to be taken to re-educate the masses. So, in accordance with a Brussels ruling, a five-year phase-in plan is to be implemented that would produce an English language variant called "EuroEnglish."

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c." Sertainly this will make the sivil servants jump for joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the "k." This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the second year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced by the "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20 per cent shorter.

In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expected to reach the stage where more komplikated changes will be possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horrible mes of the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful, and, it needs to be eradikated.

By the fourth year, people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v."

During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords containing "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz year, ve vil hav a realy sensibl riten styl. Zer wil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand each ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru.

[Guest eureka]

A long overdue re-form of the language. The illiterates of today will be on the same footing as the illiterates of the past who did not have the benefit of schooling to reinforce their illiteracy.

And Americans will have a chance to produce some literary works.

[Durgan]

A long overdue re-form of the language. The illiterates of today will be on the same footing as the illiterates of the past who did not have the benefit of schooling to reinforce their illiteracy.

And Americans will have a chance to produce some literary works.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Alcltauy Mrak Tiwan hled smoe vwies on Tihs scuebjt

Durgan

[theloniusfleabag]

Dear Durgan,

from...

http://expat-village.com/article_1690.shtml

The following is a great joke which first circulated the Internet in the late 1990’s. I hadn’t seen it in any of the 'joke loops' for 2 or 3 years. Thanks to ex-Caracas Rinconeer, Dave Oswald, now back in Canada for finding and ‘re-circulating’  this little gem.

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

Alcltauy Mrak Tiwan hled smoe vwies on Tihs scuebjt

Indeed, I have also see this 'study' done where one only needs to have the first and last letters in a word in their proper position, all the rest can be mixed up, and the sentence is still legible.

[Durgan]

theloniusfleabag:

Not qtuie the Smae. Trehe are two dniefreft smyetss, Why saipol a good srpot. It

wloud be innittesreg to see how far it wloud go. I am unsig the fsrit and lsat. The

EU seytsm is mree ceolmpx, and natrual.

Dgruan

[RB]

Can you read this? Who would have thought.

olny srmat poelpe can.

cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.

The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.

The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

[PocketRocket]

Cool.

And look, that word was perfectly easy to understand, even though I reversed the first and second "o".

[Yaro]

Excellent plan, the English language really is an absolute mess. It’s not everyone switching to Esperanto but it’s the next best thing...

[mcqueen625]

A long overdue re-form of the language. The illiterates of today will be on the same footing as the illiterates of the past who did not have the benefit of schooling to reinforce their illiteracy.

And Americans will have a chance to produce some literary works.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

You must be very insecure that you have to take every opportunity to engage in anti-Americanism. Get a life, will you! Canadian's don't have a lot to be proud of either since we keep electing a federal government that is proven to be the most corrupt in our history, and still they continue to carry on as if there was no public outrage. Maybe because they know that the people of Ontario are stupid and will vote them back in anyway. It is a sad day when one province only can decide who is going to sit in government at the federal level. It certainly doesn't say very much about Canada as a democracy.

[mockingbird]

That was very good. Cracked me up.

[Guest eureka]

Oh dear!. It doesn't say much for democracy that eleven million people in Ontario don't vote as you tell them to. and, eleven million people are stupid because they are somewhat more mature than you and don't agree with your thinking.

Canada is not a democracy because 40% of the population vote according to their perception of the best representation.

Perhaps you should take pause to consider what Representative and Responsible government means. And, perhaps when you have mastered that, you will not make silly posts about "anti-Amrtocanism."

[Melanie_]

Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt![/size]

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Great . Students will latch on to this one quickly!

[Lost in Manitoba]

Everybody must know someone who learned english as their second language. As for me, I've got German connections from my wife and Mexican from my brother in law.

I have heard so many times that the english language is very hard to learn. It may be a break with traditional spelling but why is that a bad thing. soft c and hard c, ph sounding like f..... c'mon. If we had gotten hooked on fonics years ago, maybe illiteracy would fade away.

[mcqueen625]

Oh dear!. It doesn't say much for democracy that eleven million people in Ontario don't vote as you tell them to. and, eleven million people are stupid because they are somewhat more mature than you and don't agree with your thinking.

Canada is not a democracy because 40% of the population vote according to their perception of the best representation.

Perhaps you should take pause to consider what Representative and Responsible government means. And, perhaps when you have mastered that, you will not make silly posts about "anti-Amrtocanism."

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I have taken the time to consider everything you have mentioned, but it still doesn't change the fact that basically one province out of 10 province and the Territories, gets to decide who is going to dictate this country. If Canada were truly a democracy we would have equal representation from each province. As well, we would have an elected Senate, since they are after all, supposed to be the institution to offer sober second thought, but the reality is that they are simply a rubber-stamp for any and all legislation sent to them. Why wouldn't they be, they are appointed by the very P.M. that they are supposed to scrutenizing, and for the most part their appointment is a reward for Party loyalty, and has nothing whatsoever to do with possessing certain qualifications, all that is required is to have been loyal to whatever Party the present P.M. represents.

The same thing can be said for our appointed unaccountable Judiciary who by the way Paul Martin has actually passed legislative decision making to. Paul Martin just before the last election stated; As far as I'm concerned the Supreme Court IS the final say in this country." I'm sorry, but the last time I checked I did not vote for a Supreme Court Justice, I voted for an M.P., and if those elected MP's are now not responsible for the final decisions in this country, then I would suggest that we are in fact not a democracy at all, but simply a dictatorship run by a bunch of appointees to the Supreme Court, most of which were card carrying Liberals before accending to the Bench. Under the present system we are stuck with these appointees up to the age of 75 years old, if they so choose. If we are going to turn this thing around, I would suggest that the Senate be abolished as redundant, the Supreme Court Judiciary either become elected, or have specific terms in office not exceeding 5 years.

[Guest eureka]

I have written to all those points several times in different threads. If you want an incipient totalitarianism or a sham democracy like that to the South, then hope for your wishes to come true.

[Riverwind]

If Canada were truly a democracy we would have equal representation from each province.

Last time I checked democracy means one person = one vote. Provinces don't enter into the definition at all. In the current electoral system the Atantic provinces are way over represented in parliment. For example, the city of Richmond has a population twice the size of PEI yet it has only 1 1/2 MPs vs. 4 for PEI.

Too many people have make the mistake of assuming the american model with two senators per state can be replicated here. It can't because there are too few provinces in Canada which means the senators from a single province would have way too much influence over the rest of the country. In the US, Alaska has only 2% of the senate votes. In a Canadian version PEI would have 10% of seats. That is why an exactly equal senate will never happen.

sorry, but the last time I checked I did not vote for a Supreme Court Justice, I voted for an M.P., and if those elected MP's are now not responsible for the final decisions in this country, then I would suggest that we are in fact not a democracy

All democracies recognize that their must be checks an balances in the system that include a judiciary that is not subject to political pressure. The system of appointing judges in this country needs reform but the idea that they should be elected is absurd. That said, limiting the terms to 5-10 years would be a useful reform.

[theloniusfleabag]

Dear Lost In Manitoba,

c'mon. If we had gotten hooked on fonics years ago, maybe illiteracy would fade away.

No, hooked on phonics is the worst thing to happen to literacy since the invention of mental retardation. I may make a few spelling errors on this forum once in a while, but if I am working on something important, I'll double check the spelling. (And not with 'spell check', it cannot make judgements of context). The spelling mistakes I see today, even in business, make my blood boil. I personally blame 'Hooked On Phonics' because it presented the fast, easy 'tv dinner' way of teaching children spelling, but it did more harm than good.